When I grow up ... every little girl plan her perfect future with these words. When I grow up, I'll have a big family. When I grow up I'll have a house by the sea. When I grow up I'll fly to the moon.
And than the day comes. One day, the girl wakes up and realizes that she's already grown up. And that her life does't look like she's always imagined. Not at all. She realizes that 13th, 15th, 18th or 20th birthday doesn't bring any big changes. And the most important thing - she doesn't have any excuse now. When she was "little", she was able to complain about not being old enough to do some things. But now, she can do basically anything. But .. what?
When I was twelve, I was dreaming about becoming a super famous singer. I was in love with all the singers from teenage magazines, I used to have hundreds or photos and posters on the wall in my room and I used to imagine that one day I'm going to meet 'em all - when I become famous and rich of course.
A year later - due to all the american romantic movies I used to watch - I fell in love with New York and my plan was to study the high school in USA, there I was supposed to create some incredible bussiness plan and become a billionaire (or meet mr. Perfect who is going to pay all my clothes, visits of fashion shows and all the coffees in Starbucks).
At my fifteens I realized that with my voice, I could only sing lullabyes to the deaf-mute children, nobody has given me half a milion crowns for the high school in USA, and as for men, I realized that the a perfect boy is just a pipe dream of american movies directors. So my biggest dream those days, was to escape. Escape our little smog-infested town and escape the stereotypical life I had.
And now I'm here. Holding a glass of red wine, tapping the kyboard and thinking of what I expect from my future now. My priorities changed a lot during ppast few years. But what do I want from my life ... and what should I do for it? I still don't know. Paradoxically everything's much more complicated when there are no limits which stop you from fulfulling your dreams. The only obstacle remains the person himself.
And than the day comes. One day, the girl wakes up and realizes that she's already grown up. And that her life does't look like she's always imagined. Not at all. She realizes that 13th, 15th, 18th or 20th birthday doesn't bring any big changes. And the most important thing - she doesn't have any excuse now. When she was "little", she was able to complain about not being old enough to do some things. But now, she can do basically anything. But .. what?
Alice: Which way should I go?
Cat: That depends on where you are going.
Alice: I don’t know.
Cat: Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”
When I was twelve, I was dreaming about becoming a super famous singer. I was in love with all the singers from teenage magazines, I used to have hundreds or photos and posters on the wall in my room and I used to imagine that one day I'm going to meet 'em all - when I become famous and rich of course.
A year later - due to all the american romantic movies I used to watch - I fell in love with New York and my plan was to study the high school in USA, there I was supposed to create some incredible bussiness plan and become a billionaire (or meet mr. Perfect who is going to pay all my clothes, visits of fashion shows and all the coffees in Starbucks).
At my fifteens I realized that with my voice, I could only sing lullabyes to the deaf-mute children, nobody has given me half a milion crowns for the high school in USA, and as for men, I realized that the a perfect boy is just a pipe dream of american movies directors. So my biggest dream those days, was to escape. Escape our little smog-infested town and escape the stereotypical life I had.
And now I'm here. Holding a glass of red wine, tapping the kyboard and thinking of what I expect from my future now. My priorities changed a lot during ppast few years. But what do I want from my life ... and what should I do for it? I still don't know. Paradoxically everything's much more complicated when there are no limits which stop you from fulfulling your dreams. The only obstacle remains the person himself.
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